In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “I Got Skills.”

I Got Skills

If you could choose to be a master (or mistress) of any skill in the world, which skill would you pick?

i must say, this prompt stumped me. my first thought was “isn’t this kind of the same thing as asking what superpower would you like to have?” and then came “i could say knowledge. the facts colin singleton spurted off the top of his head are things i’d like to know” 

to be frank, the skill that would most benefit me would be being smart. it’s a huge disappointment to recognize that in aesop’s fable, i’m the hare- i should be smarter but somehow in the race i’m behind. in elementary school, just trying more than the average person ensured high grades. as i passed middle school and as i’m going through high school, i’m slowly realizing that i’ve become stupid. it makes me feel like so inferior, shaming me even when i’m alone. i didn’t just decide not to care about schoolwork, but somewhere i got lost. my napping moment must have been around seventh grade, when i started to have eating problems. i remember in my old apartment, i would cry a lot because i was so frustrated about everything (but mostly my eating disorder) and my mom came into my room and told me that if i overcame it, everything would be fine. 

well that was a lie.

i feel like things only got harder, socially and academically. but maybe that’s because you can’t compare a past experience to a challenging present one.* if i’m being forced to run two miles in the freezing cold after months of staying sedimentary, i’d think it’s definitely worse than running the three miles for cross country in the heat was years ago. this afternoon, i had a speaker in my class talking about music and the civil rights movement, but instead of bob dylan or joan boaz all i could think about was how badly i had to go to the bathroom. during the torturous forty minutes between when i realized i really had to pee and the relief of being let out of class, i thought to myself “this is definitely the worst i’ve had to go” but in actuality that moment was probably last year, when i was stuck on the road for over seven hours because of the frozen roads. but to compare something that was incredibly excruciating months ago to an eminent threat is like trying to compare a sock and a horse.  

actually, i’ve changed my mind. i’d like to just be able to clear my thoughts up and not have my thoughts bouncing all around in my head .

*maybe the skill i need is to be more eloquent


nice guys finish last (day eight)


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