synesthesia (day eighty three)

when you think about it, so much of what makes us happy is made out of colours. certain places, people, even feelings, are all expressed visually, which makes me wonder why so many people hate rainy days but love sunny days when they’re all shades of the same primary colour. why we value certain races above others when we’re all human, and we’re modified versions of each other. i was playing outside today, and looking up i was just filled with this kind of happiness that’s almost fleeting. i hate this weather (in my opinion, it’s too hot already and the bugs have been swarming) and i appreciate rainy days more than others do, but it was relaxing to look up and know that the clouds would cover me from the sun for a little bit longer. i can’t describe the way i’ve been feeling, except that i’ve been feeling a little off recently. slower-moving, and really big on staring. not at people or things, but wide-eyed yet unresponsive. staring off into the distance really, except a little cross eyed perhaps. i feel like all the emptiness from this past week has been flooded by the happiness in enjoying the weather today, and though this prime time (where it’s not too hot or too cold) only lasts a few days, i’ll take it.


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