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old, sly dog (day one hundred thirty two)

first of all, i apologize for my disappearance. i may not have a lot of readers, but i’m very thankful for those of you who think that what i’m blabbering on about is important enough to follow.

things have flipped around a few times, and within the past few weeks i changed from a miserable person to a balanced, figuring-it-out girl. i think it’s no coincidence that this all came around the time i started watching the office, but more on that later. nothing sudden has happened, but i slowly and kind of randomly found little moments of pride and happiness. a 95 on a math quiz, or an anecdote my friends find hilarious. it’s sad that those are the things that make me happiest, but i guess my goals aren’t elaborate. i really want to end the school year strong, but that would involve having a non-fluctuating grade in math and such. that is not the case, and i’ve changed my goal to just hanging on.

but i can tell things have changed.

little things, like my reading habits or my exercise plan. i used to read all at once, or at the very least, large chunks of a novel in few sittings. instead, i’ve learned to put a book down for the sake of getting enough sleep. i’m rereading welcome to the monkey house, which i started about two weeks ago, and i’m still just halfway through. i try to get a story each night before bed, but i’ve skipped that the past few days. and this blog… well somehow it kind of dropped from my priorities, and i think that’s okay. summer is coming, and hopefully i’ll write enough to make it up. i also started running again. i’ve always been the one to crack jokes about being out of shape, and until i’m able to run a few miles without stopping, i’ll continue that. and i’ve joined clubs. a broadcasting one and a womens’ one.

this is all kind of a jumble but it’s just to fill in for the past several days in which i was silent on here. i’m going to try to piece out my schoolwork, which is something i rarely do because i don’t have that kind of patience. i’m a frustrated person if i don’t finish things in my first try, so this will test my patience.

so yeah, i’m sure everyone i know has been doing what i’ve just started trying. but i’m learning, which is something.

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old, sly dog (day one hundred thirty two)

first of all, i apologize for my disappearance. i may not have a lot of readers, but i’m very thankful for those of you who think that what i’m blabbering on about is important enough to follow.

things have flipped around a few times, and within the past few weeks i changed from a miserable person to a balanced, figuring-it-out girl. i think it’s no coincidence that this all came around the time i started watching the office, but more on that later. nothing sudden has happened, but i slowly and kind of randomly found little moments of pride and happiness. a 95 on a math quiz, or an anecdote my friends find hilarious. it’s sad that those are the things that make me happiest, but i guess my goals aren’t elaborate. i really want to end the school year strong, but that would involve having a non-fluctuating grade in math and such. that is not the case, and i’ve changed my goal to just hanging on.

but i can tell things have changed.

little things, like my reading habits or my exercise plan. i used to read all at once, or at the very least, large chunks of a novel in few sittings. instead, i’ve learned to put a book down for the sake of getting enough sleep. i’m rereading welcome to the monkey house, which i started about two weeks ago, and i’m still just halfway through. i try to get a story each night before bed, but i’ve skipped that the past few days. and this blog… well somehow it kind of dropped from my priorities, and i think that’s okay. summer is coming, and hopefully i’ll write enough to make it up. i also started running again. i’ve always been the one to crack jokes about being out of shape, and until i’m able to run a few miles without stopping, i’ll continue that. and i’ve joined clubs. a broadcasting one and a womens’ one.

this is all kind of a jumble but it’s just to fill in for the past several days in which i was silent on here. i’m going to try to piece out my schoolwork, which is something i rarely do because i don’t have that kind of patience. i’m a frustrated person if i don’t finish things in my first try, so this will test my patience.

so yeah, i’m sure everyone i know has been doing what i’ve just started trying. but i’m learning, which is something.

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In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Nothin’ But A Good Time.”

as a high schooler, it’s impossible to imagine a day without worrying about school. even during breaks, i’ve always had to do extra work (you can see why i hate summer now). of course i’m still a sophomore, but it’s still hard getting everything done.

if i had a day to do whatever i wanted, with no obligations at all, it’d go a little something like this:

wake up at 10 am. make a breakfast quesadilla or a smoothie

and then i’d just read. for the rest of the day, i hope. i was an avid reader when i was younger (i once won a stereo in the second grade that i still use for taylor swift cd’s), but as time went on schoolwork and extracurriculars started taking precedence. i am by no means busier than any of my friends, but i’ve been told that i move and act slowly so that could definitely hinder my scheduling. i just started americanah by chimamanda ngozi adichie and it has such an interesting beginning. i’m only on page six, but the narrator’s words almost sound angsty and sarcastic, something i wouldn’t expect from such a thick book with a dark-ish cover. i also subscribed to two magazines (teen vogue and seventeen) that have yet to come, but in the mean time i’d be getting caught up with time.

and of course, netflix. i can’t seem to finish a series, so i’ve got to work on completing merlin, bones, unbreakable kimmy schmidt, skins and friends.

an unattainable free day (day one hundred and two)

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the socially awkward teenager’s guide to vacations (day ninety three)

first of all, vacation does not automatically mean traveling. perhaps for well-adjusted it does, but you can’t go to costa rica or paris without dealing with the stress of traveling and worries over wasting money. instead, you stay home. but that doesn’t automatically mean it’s boring!

  1. take a walk (i went to the local park, where i sat in the swings and lip synched for a while. and i saw why families love taking their kids to a park. it was before 3, so there were few kids. i actually love kids, but it was enlightening to see adults playing tennis and shooting hoops. also, is there really not a reality show where amy poehler and the rest of the parks and rec cast goes around fixing minor park problems?
  2. watch a critically acclaimed movie (django unchained)
  3. buy something you’ve needed for a while [not drastically- more of a passive desire] and get it without feeling rushed (sandals)
  4. finally read, preferably something with a thicker plot that you normally would not have the time to get through (we were liars by e. lockhart is amazing, though quite disorienting)
  5. and of course, watch/rewatch/resume too many shows (in my queue? bones, sherlock, and merlin)

i actually hate traveling, and for the most part, vacations. and then i’m thrown back into school, and i’m just begging for a break. i usually don’t have a good time because my parents see it as a time to catch up on schoolwork and not an opportunity to relax completely. but so far, my break is fine.

i hope yours is too!

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In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “The Great Divide.”

up until recently, i only read fiction. it started with the boxcar children and nancy drew and slowly progressed towards those teen romance novels that are all the same and has now matured into various genres of fiction. i try my best to diversify my taste, but the farthest i’ve gone is kurt vonnegut, in contrast to the rainbow rowell and john green. my mom has always wanted me to be interested in nonfiction, and my dad hints his hopes for me by giving me books about optics or camera manuals every once in a while. but while i think knowledge is something i, personally, could always benefit from, the act of reading a book (that isn’t assigned in class) in and of itself is a break. and the contents should be make-believe, because knowing about reflections isn’t going to nullify the horrors of a bad day. obviously this makes me unrealistic, expecting the best (and most impossible) scenario. but i like my choices. they make me who i am, and i’m quite glad to say i don’t regret that.

fangirl (day forty nine)

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enjoy it because it’s happening (day twenty seven)

it’s not quite 10:30, but i’m exhausted. it may have been tennis tryouts or all the chamomile tea i drink, but i think i’m gonna call it a night. but i made the new year’s resolution to write everyday, and without any inspiration i must do the most boring thing in the world- talk about my day.

well, first of all, this semester has been… questionable. sometimes i’m having the time of my life, laughing around over a terribly awkward assembly, and other times i feel like my friends aren’t even my friends. it’s quite odd, but my new schedule has made things easier. i’ve signed up for a new art class and i have an extra free period because of the two electives i was assigned to last semester. in graphic design, we’re redesigning book covers, and i just finished rereading perks of being a wallflower a few hours ago so it seems to be the most obvious choice. the cover is pretty straightforward and i think it accompanies the story pretty well, but the idea i have is too good to turn down. the project is going to take some serious effort, and i’m not even done planning it. but i’m excited beyond belief- design is something i’ve always appreciated and a hobby i’ve recently picked up. the interest in graphic design makes watching commercials and reading advertisements different. i mostly criticize aloud even though i technically couldn’t make anything better.

i’m also rewatching twin peaks, which is odd since it was so hard to finish. the show’s incredibly dense, and i only started watching because dan smith always seems to reference it in songs/music videos and interviews. nevertheless, i’ve thoroughly enjoyed the pilot and seeing the first appearance of agent cooper. somewhere in the endless numbers of murky episodes, i really started to become fond of the show. maybe it’s the reassuring promise that the mystifying music will be in every episode, or the fact that most people my age don’t watch the show, but i now claim this show to be my own. it’s a fandom i’ve relished being a part of, especially since it’s coming back in 2016. before knowing of the return, it was quite the experience to enjoy something that has been technically dead for over twenty years. odd how i see things differently after this information has come out.

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